A Poem...Sort Of


Red

I’ll skip your hair, it’s easy, it’s for strangers.
Your shirt with the hat
The stopping when it’s time
The raspberries that flavor your favorite drink
Your lips when they’re not being pink
The roses that surround you
The accents of the car that first night
My heart I gave you
The back right of your closet
Your fun shoes
The shirt you wore with them in the picture you sent
My love for you
My pain if I lost you
The strawberries I’ll fight your dad for
The cherries you gave me at the cookout
My favorite for last:
Your face when you blush.

Yeah, It's That Tasty

So everyone knows that bacon is just about the best meat to ever meat a meat...or something. Even if ham and sausage didn't exist, bacon would still be enough reason for me to never be kosher or halal. So why such a redundancy in this post? I found this This gem of a picture online that speculates what bacon is really made out of. I think it's a pretty close guess.



That brings up a good point. We all know that the regular bacon that comes from pigs already tastes like some sort of magical magicness. Unicorns are also magic though, so what if we could harvest bacon from a unicorn? How good would a magical meat from a magical animal be? Freakin' awesome, that's how good! I think that's why unicorns have a horn. To protect their bacon from people. They know darn well that we'd be at their bellies to get their tasty, extra magical bacon.

I'm probably going to have to have some bacon at lunch today. I'm fine with that arrangement.

My Girlfriend Went Halfsies on a Titty Bar??

So there's this ghetto strip club (The Diamond Lounge--super classy) that I drive past on my morning commute every day. Over the past couple weeks I've noticed a change to the sign out front. It says something to the effect of

Under New Management
Teresa & Jazz!!

I suspect that "Jazz" might be some sort of nickname for Jen that I haven't heard yet, but I'm not sure about that part. Also, ampersands and exclamation points are punctuation marks Teri has been wont to use before. The clues are all there right on the sign. The thought has occurred to me that it might be two different people altogether whom I've never met who own such a classy establishment (it does indeed put the 'lassy' in 'classy' in case a certain couple reads this) and not Teri and Jen. It does seem shocking that she wouldn't have told me something about this by now, though I do remember not much being said when a job interview happened, so she might not want to jinx the new bidness. Hmmm. It would seem that further sleuthing is in order. Either way, I do believe that there's a good chance that Jen now has the new nickname of Jazz. I hope she's fine with that.

Now my blog has officially been updated. :)